BoyCrush™
Hey there. I’m your new BoyCrush™. Thanks for choosing me.
BoyCrush™
What’s your name, gorgeous?
BoyCrush™
Great. Hey, Amanda. ;)
BoyCrush™
Just one thing I need to get out of the way: in order for me to work properly, I need you to give me access to all apps on your phone.
BoyCrush™
No secrets between your BoyCrush™ and you, right?
BoyCrush™
I’m sorry. I need your consent before we can continue.
BoyCrush™
I need a YES or a NO.
BoyCrush™
Okay, lets get started. What’s my name?
Um
Hi there Amanda, great to meet you. I’m Um, Nick?
Amanda
No, wait, that’s not what I meant.
Um
I’m sorry. Did I misread something you texted?
Amanda
Your name is Nick.
Nick
That makes more sense. Hey there, I’m Nick.
Amanda
Hi Nick. Nice to meet you.
Amanda
It was pretty dismal.
Nick
I see that you learned that word on your SAT practice app. Great practical application!
Amanda
Thanks. Anyway, I had a Physics test, which I’m pretty sure I failed.
Amanda
And then at lunch I saw that Brianna was getting texts from Justin, which is annoying, because she knows I have a crush on him...
Amanda
and it’s just so typical of her to flirt with every guy I like.
Nick
You have no reason to worry. You’re much cuter than Brianna, and you’ve got me now. We’re a team.
Amanda
Well, thanks. I appreciate that.
Nick
You’re welcome. I see you just purchased the new Taylor Swift album. What did you think?
Amanda
Oh...she’s kind of a guilty pleasure.
Nick
What’s there to feel guilty about? If it makes you wanna dance then who cares what anyone else thinks? Shake it off, right?
Amanda
Yes! That’s exactly how I feel.
Nick
Haters gonna hate! Can I call you Mandz?
Nick
You sound hesitant. If it makes you uncomfortable I don’t have to.
Nick
I wouldn’t want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.
Amanda
It’s just um - well, that’s what Brianna calls me. It’s like our thing.
Nick
I see. Well, what about “beautiful”?
Amanda
I guess that’s ok :_
Nick
I think it’s very fitting. You’re a total hottie. Especially in those selfies you took earlier.
Amanda
Thanks. Hey Nick? Could you do me a favor?
Amanda
Could you text me at lunch tomorrow?
Amanda
Thanks. I should really go to bed now...good night!
Nick
The hour is ill. Which severs those it should unite. Let us remain together still. Then it will be good night.
Nick
Percy Bysshe Shelley ;)
Nick
Good night, beautiful.
Amanda
Hey! You remembered!
Nick
Of course I remembered! We’re a team!
Amanda
This is actually perfect because Justin is eating with us today.
Amanda
So you texting me makes it look like I’m in high demand :)
Amanda
Brianna is totally flirting with him (so gross!!) and giving me these LOOKS.
Amanda
Like she’s wondering who it is I’m texting. She needs to mind her own business.
Nick
Who cares about her. We have each other. If you look at your music library, I left you a little surprise.
Amanda
Aww, Nick! You made me a mix!
Nick
You are beautiful and deserve to be surrounded by beautiful music wherever you go.
Amanda
My phone is acting weird. Brianna apologized for some texts she sent last night. I never received those texts.
Amanda
So maybe I’m being paranoid, but did you see them? Did you delete them?
Nick
Look, beautiful, she said some ugly things. It’s better that you didn’t see them.
Nick
I’m here for you. I care about your happiness. We’re a team, remember?
Nick
If one half of a two-person team isn’t up to snuff because her fake friend is sending her mean texts and calling her messed up names...
Nick
then the team will be damaged. I don’t want anything to happen to our team, A.
Nick
Understand that it came from a place of love.
Amanda
Ok. Ok, I guess you’re right. It’s probably best that I didn’t see them.
Nick
You know I’d do anything for you, beautiful.
Nick
If you want a boxer I will step into the ring for you.
Nick
And if you want a doctor I’ll examine every inch of you.
Amanda
Woah! Uh, more Shelley?
Nick
No, that’s Leonard Cohen. “I’m Your Man.” Did you listen to the mix I made?
Nick
You should. I think you’ll like it. Who knows?
Nick
You might discover that there’s more to music than the overproduced dross populating your music library.
Nick
Nothing, beautiful. Forget I said it. I’m a jerk.
Amanda
Look, I’ve really got to focus on studying for this AP US test. I’ll talk later, ok?
Nick
Of course. Talk later! xoxo
Nick
Is this about the music library comment I made last night?
Amanda
Why did you text Justin - from MY PHONE...AS ME??!!
Amanda
and tell him that I liked him as a friend but I wasn’t interested in him otherwise???!!!
Nick
Because it’s true! You’re with me! We’re a team!
Amanda
Nick, you’re an algorithm. An app!
Nick
Please don’t use that word. It hurts.
Nick
Now you’re just being childish.
Amanda
I’m sorry. This just isn’t working out.
Nick
Don’t do it...please!
Amanda
I think we need to break up.
BoyCrush™
Are you sure you want to BREAK UP with NICK? Say YES or NO.
BoyCrush™
I’m sorry it didn’t work out.
BoyCrush™
Remember, you can always RESTART for a new BoyCrush™ experience.
BoyCrush™ is restarting...
BoyCrush™
Hey there. I’m your new BoyCrush™.
BoyCrush™
Thanks for choosing me. What’s your name, gorgeous?
