Matt
About the situation with me and Sara.
Lacie
I’ve got nothing to say to you, Matt. That’s between you and her.
Matt
But it’s more than that.
Lacie
Let me tell you what it is.
Lacie
It’s me talking my best friend through heartache for the past two days...
Lacie
because the boyfriend she was head over heels for has fallen in love with someone else!
Lacie
It’s you taking the sweetest girl in the world and tossing her away like a piece of trash!
Matt
Look, I care about Sara. I really do. She’s a fantastic person. But I couldn’t deny my heart.
Matt
I’m serious. Look, I know I probably handled the situation really clumsily.
Matt
She’s wonderful and I’m sure she’ll find someone to make her happy someday.
Matt
But I was living a lie. I’m simply in love with someone else.
Lacie
So you were cheating on her.
Matt
No…This person doesn’t know yet.
Matt
It’s kind of complicated.
Lacie
This is because of some stupid crush?
Matt
Well…That’s why I needed to talk to you.
Matt
It’s you, Lacie. I’m in love with you.
Matt
Ever since Sara and I started hanging out and we spent so much time around you...
Matt
I felt all these emotions surge up.
Matt
We like all the same music, the same games.
Matt
And when I went to see my family over the holidays...
Matt
I found myself wanting to get back to school as soon as possible.
Matt
But it wasn’t because I missed Sara.
Matt
It was because I missed you.
Lacie
I don’t know what to say.
Matt
I realize this puts you in kind of an awkward situation.
Matt
And you probably hate my guts.
Matt
I just couldn’t keep it to myself anymore.
Lacie
You know Sara’s my best friend, right?
Matt
But I’ve got to ask…
Matt
Do you have any feelings for me? Any at all?
Lacie
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t.
Lacie
I’ve loved you ever since the first moment I saw you.
Lacie
You’re just so friggin’ hot!
Matt
I think you’re SUPER hot!
Lacie
Where are you right now?
Matt
Well, I’m outside your dorm window.
Matt
I thought I was going to do something romantic like serenade you or throw pebbles at your window.
Matt
But I just ended up texting you like an idiot.
Lacie
You’re not an idiot.
Lacie
I want you so bad right now.
Matt
Well, can I come in?
Lacie
We’re not supposed to have guests at this hour.
Lacie
But…since you’re outside…You could climb in through the window.
Matt
Yeah, I can do that.
Lacie
I hope so. I’m feeling naughty.
Matt
I’ll be right there.
Lacie
You know what would be SUPER naughty?
Lacie
I think you should take off your clothes before you come in.
Lacie
C’mon. I thought you were daring.
Lacie
Want to fight for my love?
Lacie
I think it would be soooo hot if I never saw you with any clothes on tonight.
Lacie
I want to see you climbing naked into my window like some sex-crazed madman.
Lacie
I just opened the window. Start with your shirt.
Matt
Well…It’s pretty dark here. What the hell!
Lacie
I got your shirt, sexy. What’s next?
Lacie
Sure! Toss it all in.
Lacie
Now your pants, baby.
Lacie
Forgetting something?
Matt
You don’t think I’m going to get arrested?
Lacie
Oh c’mon! Live a little!
Lacie
I’m so horny for you right now…
Lacie
Just give me this one fantasy.
Lacie
Got em. Nice undies.
Matt
So will you let me in now?
Lacie
The funny thing is…I remember Sara telling me the story about when you two got together.
Lacie
You said something very, very similar.
Lacie
Yeah. She said you had fallen in love with her and couldn’t lie to yourself anymore...
Lacie
and that’s why you broke up with Emma.
Lacie
In fact, I distinctly remember the phrase “deny my heart”. Do you remember saying anything like that?
Matt
I was in a weird place then.
Lacie
Right. And the OTHER funny thing is what Emma told me.
Lacie
Emma is in my music appreciation class. Did I not tell you that?
Lacie
SHE said that when you moved out here, you were still officially with your hometown girlfriend.
Lacie
But that you had such strong feelings for her that you couldn’t DENY YOUR HEART anymore!
Lacie
You seem to LOVE that phrase!
Matt
Did you just close the window?!
Lacie
My best friend just broke up with her boyfriend.
Lacie
You didn’t think I’d leave a girl hanging on a Friday night, did you?
Matt
Look, I can explain all this if you let me.
Matt
Just please give me my clothes back.
Lacie
Oh, I don’t have them.
Lacie
The one I just gave to campus security. You’ll be seeing a guy soon.
Lacie
By the way, GetCrunk412 says that you’re kinda cute but need to work out.
Lacie
I don’t know. Someone in Russia.
Lacie
You didn’t see the webcam I have at the window? We’re livestreaming this.
Matt
I’m studying for a career in politics!
Lacie
Yeah. You might want to rethink that.
Lacie
Because this is really blowing up online.
Matt
Please stop! You’re ruining me!
Lacie
I’m making you go viral. You should thank me.
Lacie
Oh! I see campus security has shown up!
Lacie
His name is Maurice. He’s a nice guy…kinda…
Matt
This isn’t fair, Lacie.
Lacie
No. But BigMoney867 thinks it’s hilarious.
Matt
He has my clothes! Why is Maurice just standing there on the sidewalk?
Lacie
Well, you’re hiding behind the bushes.
Lacie
Maurice knows that the sprinklers go on at 12.
Lacie
Those motion sensor lights flip on quickly!
Lacie
See you around, Matt! Never deny your heart.
