The next day, I stretch out on my pool house floor next to the space heater…
And smooth a hand over Quinn’s latest article:
Quinn’s Qorner – August 24, 1996.
Quinn’s Qorner
“Truth Serum Strikes Again!”
Quinn’s Qorner
The truth serum continues to spread through Northside High’s student body.
Quinn’s Qorner
And this time, it’s hit the same victim twice.
Quinn’s Qorner
Poor girl…
Quinn’s Qorner
But who’s behind the serum?
Quinn’s Qorner
Who would target Northside students?
Quinn’s Qorner
A disgruntled teacher? A rogue scientist gone mad?
Quinn’s Qorner
Your reporter investigates.
Quinn’s article about Vivi was a sensation.
Everyone’s talking about the mysterious truth serum…
That’s making people blurt out embarrassing secrets.
The students have all bought into Quinn’s theory.
But the teachers still think it’s just some dumb prank.
A smile stretches across my face as I look at my drawing…
It shows Vivi standing on top of the cafeteria table…
Teetering on her high heels…
I felt slightly mean while drawing it…
But then I saw the coffee-stained dress hanging in my closet…
And I didn’t feel bad anymore.
My plan to take down Summer and her evil minions is going well…
Summer has completely abandoned Vivi and Briar.
But who should I target next?
There’s a knock on my window.
I get up, a smile on my face.
I slide the window open, and he pokes his head inside.
Jay
Still no boys allowed in the pool house?
This is how Jay used to sneak in when we were younger.
Raina
Depends on the boy.
He slips through the window and hops down to the floor.
Warmth fills my body as I see him standing there.
He looks around the room, hands in his pockets.
Thinking of the last time he was here.
His whispered words in the dark.
The gentle way he laid me on the couch in the corner.
The look of awe and rapture on his face as he—
Jay
Did you enjoy the game last night?
Ridding my head of my wayward thoughts.
Raina
Congrats on the win!
He grins his lopsided smile.
Then his eyes travel to the couch.
This time it’s his turn to clear his throat.
Jay
So, you busy tonight?
Jay
Peter’s throwing a party for his birthday.
Jay
I was wondering if you wanted to go with me.
Jay
Unless you have something else going on.
I’ve never been to a cool kids’ party before.
Raina
Peter didn’t invite me.
His eyes sparkle, and he takes a folded piece of paper out of his pocket.
Jay
There’s gonna be an open mic!
I squeal and reach for the paper.
He teasingly flicks it away, out of my reach.
Jay
You’ll have to come to the party if you wanna hear it.
But I’ve never even been to a high school party before.
His face falls, then he shrugs.
Jay
We’re not really talking right now.
I try to keep my voice casual.
Raina
I’m sorry to hear that.
He plops down on my couch and sighs.
Jay
She’s still ****** at me because of Vivi…
Jay
Like it’s my fault she put those Polaroids in my locker!
Jay
I really did throw them out as soon as I saw them.
Jay
What else was I supposed to do?
I give him an understanding look.
Raina
Of course it’s not your fault, Jay…
Jay
Summer wants some big apology.
Jay
She wants me to grovel…like always.
Jay
But I just don’t know anymore.
He shakes his head, looking tired.
Raina
You don’t know…what?
He looks around my pool house.
Jay
It’s nice being back in here.
Jay
This used to be my favorite place to write rhymes.
Raina
You’re still welcome here anytime.
And the air between us sparks with heat.
And I wish so badly that I could kiss him.
He runs a hand over his mouth…
As if he’s thinking the same thing.
But then he abruptly stands.
Jay
So, you coming or what?
Three years ago, Summer stole Jay from me…
And tonight could be my chance to steal him back.
And he sounds like he’s finally getting tired of her bull****.
Raina
I’ll be ready at nine.
The doorbell rings, and my pulse quickens.
I rush out of my room and skip down the stairs.
But my dad is already answering the door by the time I get there.
I catch Jay’s sparkling eyes as he steps inside my house.
He smiles at me as I walk up.
Jay
I know, it’s been too long.
Dad
How’s your father doing?
I cringe as I see Jay’s eyes darken.
I duck under my dad’s arm and start to shove Jay out the door.
Raina
See you later, Dad.
Dad
Where are you off to tonight?
Jay is about to respond, but I cut him off.
Raina
Just a friend’s house.
My dad looks at me skeptically, but I don’t wait around to hear him protest.
I’ve never done anything like this before, so he can deal this one time.
I pull Jay out of my house and wave goodbye.
Dad
Don’t be out too late.
Jay
Nice seeing you Mr. Sen!
I shut the door and walk with Jay to his car.
He opens the door and smiles.
Jay smiles back, then turns up the music and we drive off.
It’s going to be a good night.
When we arrive at the party…
Jay parks his car and we walk up to the gate of Peter’s house.
Peter’s dad is filthy rich, and divorced…
So he basically lets Peter do whatever he wants.
I’ve heard of the legendary parties at “Peter’s Playhouse”…
But I never thought I’d actually be at one.
When Jay and I walk into the party…
After being non-existent for three years…
I’m suddenly the center of attention…
And I feel like a deer caught in headlights.
But Jay just smiles and throws an arm over my shoulder.
Jay
Come on, let’s get a drink.
And we walk into the party like that…
With Jay’s arm around my shoulder.
Heads turn as we work our way through the crowd.
People stop Jay to say hello as we pass by…
And they throw tentative smiles my way.
I guess showing up to a party with Jay has its perks.
We finally make it outside to the drinks table.
Raina
Sure, sounds great.
And gets caught up in a conversation with some friends.
I start to look around, suddenly feeling out of place.
I hear a familiar voice behind me.
I’m ready to spit back an insult when—
Briar
Red is a great color on you.
I immediately give her the stink eye.
Is this the start of some cruel prank?
She takes one look at my face and sighs.
Briar
I meant it as a compliment, Raina.
She still has the same plump lips…
But something about her seems different.
Her eyes are…softer somehow.
Briar
It’s cool to see you out!
I’m not sure what to make of Briar’s sudden change in attitude…
But I decide to go with it.
The cool kids have never been this friendly to me before.
Raina
It’s cool to be here.
She glances over at Jay, still talking to his friends.
Briar
So, you came with Jay?
Briar
You’re SO much better for him than Summer.
Briar
She treats him like dirt.
Briar
No, you don’t even know the half of it.
Just then — Jay reappears by my side and hands me a cup of beer.
The music turns up a notch…
And everyone’s favorite hip-hop song comes on.
Briar winks at me and shimmies away.
I look at the dance floor skeptically…
But Jay grabs my hand anyway and pulls me into the pulsating crowd.
How can I say no to that?
Jay is with me the entire time.
And it feels like heaven.
Dripping with sweat, we go to get another drink.
But then — the music stops, and Peter gets on the mic.
Peter
You know what time it is…
A few whoops from the crowd.
Peter
Time to make an *** of yourselves on…
Peter
First up is my main man — Jay!
Jay looks at me with a gleam in his eyes.
I watch with joy as Jay goes to the middle of the party…
And starts to rap his rhyme.
His friends beatbox to the rhythm…
And everyone claps along.
But Jay’s eyes are directed at me the entire time.
Everyone claps and hollers when he’s done.
Peter takes back the mic, clapping as beer sloshes out of his cup.
Peter
That was sick, man!
Jay comes back to where I’m standing.
Jay
It’s great to be rhyming again.
Raina
It’s great to hear your rhymes again.
And my pulse starts to race.
His hand sweeps my cheek.
Raina
I’ve missed you too.
The energy between us surges…
And my body feels like it’s on fire.
I lick my lips, drawing his eyes there.
He brings his lips close to mine…
The backyard gate slams, and we jump apart.
We both look over at the same time…
And my eyes lock on the last person I want to see.
Summer walks into the party like a celebrity…
Jay instantly steps away from me…
Then come to a stop on Jay and me.
She makes a beeline for us.
And after giving me a fake smile…
She puts a hand on Jay’s arm.
Jay
There’s nothing to talk about.
Summer
I know what happened wasn’t your fault.
Summer
It was all that *****, Vivi.
But her eyes are full of malice.
I roll my eyes in response.
I know Jay will see right through—
He gives me an apologetic look…
Then he lets her lead him to the deck.
I sigh, watching them for a moment.
Jay hinted earlier that he wanted to end things with Summer…
I linger at the drinks table while I wait for him.
And shiver, wishing I’d brought a cardigan.
I try and get the keg to work…
But since I’ve never used one before…
I just fumble around like an idiot.
But then, someone takes the tap from my hand.
I look up and meet Marcus’ bemused eyes.
Then leans on the drinks table.
Marcus
Heard you came here with Armstrong.
He points over to the deck.
Marcus
Looks like you’re about to lose your date.
I stiffen, and follow his finger.
Summer is sitting with Jay on the deck…
Her arms wrapped around him…
Whispering something in his ear.
Desperate to hear what they’re saying…
I make my way carefully to the side of the deck…
And listen in on their conversation.
Summer
I’m sorry I got mad at you.
Summer
Do you forgive me?
Jay
I guess so. It’s just…
Jay
I’m tired of all the drama.
Jay
I have enough going on with football and my dad…
Jay
So if it’s going to be like this between us then—
Summer
— It won’t, you have my word.
Summer
Let’s just forget any of this ever happened.
Summer
Come here baby, I’ve missed you.
Their words suddenly cut off…
There’s shuffling, and then I hear Summer moan.
Just in time to see them…
I get shoved in the back…
Right across the bottom of the deck…
And fall right at Summer’s feet.
I look up to see Peter’s drunken face smirking at me.
His hands held up in mock apology.
Peter
Saw you creepin’ on my man and his girl.
Peter
Thought you might want a closer look.
Summer
Gross, you were spying on us?!
He looks surprised, and confused…
And my embarrassment triples.
I get up slowly, and brush off my dress…
A drunken crowd starts gathering around…
Everyone’s gaping, wondering what the commotion is about.
My chest starts to heave.
I feel the room closing in around me.
I have to get out of here.
I push through the crowd…
Away from the bumping music and flashing lights…
Out of sight of all the cool kids…
All the way back to the loneliness of my bedroom.
But after a few minutes of crying…
My mom’s head peeks around the corner.
I discreetly try to wipe my face.
Raina
I’m just tired, Mom.
Raina
It’s been a long night.
I hope she’ll take the hint and leave…
But she sits down on my bed instead.
Mom
Did something happen with Jay?
Hearing his name makes me feel sick.
Raina
No, nothing happened.
Raina
And…nothing ever will.
That last part slips out.
But my emotions are in overdrive…
She then smooths a hand down my dress.
Mom
You haven’t worn this dress in a long time.
Mom
And your hair looks pretty.
I’m definitely not in the mood for compliments.
Raina
I really just want to go to bed.
She sighs, then stands up.
But then puts a hand on my shoulder.
Mom
You are perfect exactly as you are.
Mom
You don’t have to change for anyone.
Mom
Be true to yourself, Raina.
Mom
And happiness will find you, you’ll see.
She doesn’t wait for a response…
And I blow out a breath when the door closes behind her.
A cold, familiar wind suddenly sweeps across my face…
And the feel of it makes me smile.
Because I may not be perfect…
But I have the locker now.
And with its magic, I can create my own destiny.
And become the girl I’ve always wanted to be.
I walk coolly to my desk…
And wrap my fingers around my pen.
Monday morning, I step out of my house…
Pull the hood of my sweatshirt over my head…
I pretend not to hear him.
I sigh, then spin around.
He comes to an abrupt stop.
Clearly taken aback by my tone.
Jay
Why’d you run off Saturday night?
Raina
What did you want me to do?
Raina
Stay there and watch you and Summer suck face?
He runs a hand through his hair.
Jay
She’s still my girlfriend, Raina.
I shake my head in disbelief.
I have no idea what to say.
So I go with what’s in my heart.
Raina
Why are you with her, Jay?
And blows out a deep breath.
Jay
I told you — she’s my girlfriend.
Raina
Then why did you tell me you missed me?
And that silence makes me feel like a fool.
But I still have to know one thing.
Raina
Before Summer showed up to the party…
Raina
Did you want to kiss me?
And leave him standing there on my lawn.
I pass by the cool kids’ lockers…
And glare at their laughing, beautiful faces.
Hatred seethes within me.
I walk straight to my locker…
The cool glow of the letters lights my face.
I‘m tired of being invisible…
Of playing second fiddle to ******* like Summer.
Of being the butt of jokes for jerks like Peter.
It’s time to make them all pay.
I look at all the old names written on my locker wall…
And wonder what those fools did to deserve their fate.
I laugh as a cold wind sweeps my face.
Eleanor Buckley’s words glow bright, and I read them again:
When next your guilty eyes do lock with mine…
And loudly rings a bell throughout the halls…
Your secrets dark and dirty deep entwined…
Will seize your lips and be revealed to all.
With heart enclosed a heart’s desires tells.
A double-crosser crossed eliminates.
Liars, cheats, and tormentors pray tell, lest…
This magic locker’s walls secure your fate.
I see other names on the locker crossed out with X’s…
And I know exactly what to do.
I write out the name of my next victim.
And cross it out with an “X.”
Just then — a piece of paper hits me in the face.
Did someone just slide something into my locker?
I have no idea what this is or who it’s from…
But I have more important things to worry about right now.
I stuff the note in my bag.
I have to go find Peter Powell.
The smile creeps back onto my face.
I can’t wait to hear his secret, whatever it is.
I’m sure it’ll be something good.
I thrust my locker door open…
I just hit Smelly Shelly in the head.
She stares at me, blinking her creepy eyes.
Shelly
Your drawing is very accurate.
She holds up Quinn’s article and points at my drawing of Vivi.
She blinks, looking at me curiously.
Shelly
It is rather strange, isn’t it?
Shelly
All the secrets that are being revealed.
Shelly
What do you make of it?
I don’t have time for this.
Raina
I’m late for a meeting…
I turn and start to walk away.
Shelly
I’ll save a seat for you!
I look for Peter all day long…
He’s nowhere to be found.
But something weird happens throughout the day.
As I walk to and from class…
People actually notice me.
And some even stop to say hello.
It’s almost as if just *being* at Peter’s party…
Has elevated my social status.
Even after I fell flat on my face.
The last period bell rings…
And I still haven’t seen Peter.
I head to my locker, disappointed…
And get a waft of Smelly Shelly as I walk up.
She stares at me, a notebook in her hands.
Shelly
Would you like to do homework together this afternoon?
I shake my head, still holding my breath.
Shelly
Alright. Perhaps tomorrow then.
She’s about to walk off, and then I see what’s in her notebook.
I rip the notebook from her hands.
Raina
What the **** are these?
Shelly
They’re for my art class.
I flip through the pages, irritated.
Raina
Are you copying me?
Then takes her notebook back.
Shelly
Copying? No, of course not…
Just then — I feel a tap on my shoulder.
I spin around, surprised.
She hands me a jean jacket.
Briar
I noticed you’re always wearing a sweatshirt…
Briar
And thought you could use an upgrade.
I take off my sweatshirt and put on the jean jacket.
Raina
I didn’t think anyone would talk to me after what happened at the party…
Briar
Honestly, I think most people were too drunk to even remember.
Briar
Peter was just being a dick.
Briar looks at Smelly Shelly and lowers her voice.
Briar
These lockers are kind of gross…
I look back at my locker.
Briar
Want to share my mine?
Did I just get invited to share Briar’s cool kids’ locker with her?
I take one look at Smelly Shelly…
And don’t even think twice.
Raina
That would be great!
Briar
Awesome, bring your stuff over tomorrow morning!
Briar
We’re cheering at football practice today.
Peter will definitely be there.
Briar
Come watch if you want!
I walk with Briar over to the football field.
Leaving Smelly Shelly next to my old locker, staring after me.
The stadium is starting to fill up with a small crowd.
The football players are warming up on the field.
The cheerleaders are stretching on the sideline nearby.
I spot Peter trying to jump tires out on the field.
Guess that’s why he didn’t show for school today.
Still hungover from Saturday night.
I walk over to where the cheerleaders are standing…
And take a few steps onto the field.
A few guys stare at me, confused.
I don’t feel the familiar presence at my back.
I spin around and am about to respond…
Peter’s eyes lock with mine.
A cold wind sweeps by us.
His mouth contorts strangely and—
He yells so everyone can hear…
Peter
I slept with Tamika so she’d convince Coach to put me on the team.
She was introduced during one of the pep rallies.
Tamika is the coach’s wife.
For a moment, no one says anything.
But the shock in the crowd is palpable.
I hear a strangled growl…
And then a large figure comes charging toward Peter.
Coach
WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!
Peter’s face has gone ghost white.
Coach
You slept with Tammy?!
Peter just shakes his head, speechless.
Coach
ANSWER ME, **** YOU!
Coach
DID YOU SCREW MY WIFE?!
Peter takes a few steps back…
His hands out in front of him.
Peter
It was her idea, sir!
Peter
She took advantage of me!
Coach’s fist comes out of nowhere.
The punch takes Peter down like a sack of potatoes.
Coach launches himself at Peter…
And everyone immediately jumps into action.
People try to separate them, but just end up pushing each other.
I nearly get a right hook to the face…
But Jay shoves me out of the way at the last second.
I duck out from the crowd…
And lean against the stadium wall, my chest heaving.
Mr. Armstrong and a few other teachers come running down from the stands.
Mr. Armstrong
What the **** is going on here?!
Who is still on top of Peter.
Peter looks utterly helpless…
Blood gushing like a river from his nose and mouth.
Mr. Armstrong
Get your hands off him!
But Coach doesn’t listen.
Jay, his face bright red, tries to pull Peter up.
He gets a savage elbow to the jaw…
But eventually manages to free his friend.
Mr. Armstrong
I’m calling the police!
Mr. Armstrong
Someone grab the nurse!
Mr. Armstrong
Peter, my office. NOW.
Mr. Armstrong
The rest of you — go home!
Mr. Armstrong
The scrimmage is canceled.
So does the rest of the crowd.
Marcus
Well, there goes the football season!
Marcus
All because Powell couldn’t keep it in his pants!
Briar
What a freakin’ mess.
Briar
We’ll never make it to the championship now.
Ms. Akins
It must be the truth serum…it’s real.
Mr. Parker
Are they spiking the athletes’ water now?
A million feelings assault me at once.
Jay slumps down on the ground, his head in his hands.
The rest of the team isn’t any better.
Coach is hauled away by a couple of teachers, still throwing punches.
Peter is carried off by two teammates to the principal’s office…
Blood dripping from his face.
I follow a small crowd of students back into the school building…
Instinctively, I go back to my locker…
I stare at Peter’s name, with the “X” through it…
“A double-crosser crossed eliminates.”
Peter will definitely get expelled from school for this.
And Jay’s chances of winning a championship his senior year…
I bury my head in my hands…
Maybe Quinn was right after all…
Maybe this locker is cursed.
I look up at the glowing names on the wall…
Take the silver pen out of my pocket…
And place it back on the locker floor.
I step out of the locker and fill my backpack with all my things.
Preparing to move into Briar’s locker tomorrow.
Suddenly, I hear someone behind me.
Quinn
This ****'s gettin’ REAL.
I spin around, and Quinn steps back.
Quinn
**** girl, you don’t look so good.
She eyes the tears streaming down my face.
I wipe my face and just nod.
Quinn
You wanna talk about something?
Quinn
Did you hear what happened back there?
Quinn
The truth serum’s getting stronger!
Just then, Mr. Armstrong’s office door opens…
And Peter walks out, his head wrapped in bandages.
He doesn’t make eye contact with anyone.
The students in the halls murmur and gape as he walks by.
Mr. Armstrong pokes his head out of his office and yells at everyone in the halls.
Mr. Armstrong
School is DISMISSED!
Mr. Armstrong
Go home, or I’ll expel you ALL!
I slam my locker door shut, angry…
Quinn raises her eyebrows.
Quinn
I think he’s just misunderstood.
I look at her like she’s crazy.
We start filing out of the halls with the rest of the students.
Quinn whispers in my ear.
Quinn
How quick can you get me a drawing of Peter?
Raina
I don’t know if I want to keep doing these…
Quinn
We’re reporting TRUTH!
Raina
Maybe some truths are better left unsaid…
Quinn
I’m a journalist — revealing the truth is my job.
Raina
But revealing the truth can have…
Raina
Unintended consequences.
Raina
Didn’t you see what just happened back there?
Quinn
So? That’s the point.
Quinn
Reporting truth is a pillar of our democracy.
We step outside of the building.
Quinn
Get me that drawing by tomorrow morning.
I watch her as she walks away.
And I’m just about to leave…
When someone else comes around the corner.
He walks over and stands in front of me.
Jay
And about this morning.
There are a million different words on my lips…
But when I get a good look at him, I gasp.
I reach up and rub the swelling around his mouth.
He winces, but doesn’t move away.
Raina
You need to put ice on that!
Raina
It’s turning purple!
He leans back against the brick wall.
Jay
Nothing does anymore.
I let out a sigh, then look down.
His hands clench at his sides.
Jay
I can’t believe he’d do this.
Jay
To Coach — to the team!
Jay
I never thought he’d stoop this low.
Jay
Tamika helps out at our practices.
Jay
And Coach will do anything she says.
Jay
Peter bombed at tryouts this summer…
Jay
He showed up hungover every day…
Jay
And Coach wasn’t happy.
Jay
But I guess Peter seduced Tamika…
Jay
And she got Coach to change his mind.
I shake my head, disgusted.
And any regret I had melts away.
I don’t feel bad for Peter.
I feel bad for Coach and the team.
He looks utterly defeated.
I reach out and put a hand on his arm.
Jay
And now I’ve got an interrogation from my dad to look forward to.
Raina
Tell him you’re not in the mood.
Jay
— When it comes to him, it doesn’t matter how I feel.
My heart twists painfully.
Raina
That can’t be true.
He runs his hands over his face.
Jay
Ever since Mom died, it’s like I just can’t do anything right.
Jay
Nothing I do is good enough for him.
Jay
I try to be a perfect student…
Jay
A perfect football player.
Jay
But somehow, I still disappoint him.
Jay
The only thing he approves of is…
Jay
Being with a girl like Summer is the only thing I’m doing right in his eyes.
Raina
So that’s why you stay with her?!
He just turns to me, his eyes full of sadness.
And then the truth hits me like a ton of bricks.
He’ll never break up with Summer.
Not when it’s the only thing his father approves of.
Crushing sadness envelops me…
Jay
I better go talk to him.
I feel awful, so I just nod and grab my backpack.
When I do, the folded piece of paper falls from the front pocket.
To my surprise, he gestures to it.
I pick it up from the floor.
Jay
You asked me a question this morning.
Jay
Figured you deserve an answer.
My mind going over our conversation from this morning.
What question did I ask him?
“Did you want to kiss me?”
I look down at the paper.
What does it really matter?
It doesn’t change anything.
It just makes everything hurt more.
Would I have been better off not knowing the truth at all?
I contemplate this as I head to the parking lot.
It’s empty — the cops and students gone.
I decide to take the long way home.
But something stops me in my tracks.
She’s straddling someone in the front seat…
I just saw Jay walk back into the school building.
How’d he get back here so fast?
But then I take a closer look.
