Sue sits on the bathroom floor in nothing but her flimsy dressing gown.
The cold, hard tiles send a chill through her, but she doesn’t care.
Five sticks stare back at her all saying the same thing…
Negative. Negative. Negative. Negative. Negative!
She screams and throws the sticks against the wall.
They hit it like bullets, and then bounce back down to the floor.
One by one, by one, by one, by one, one by FUCKING one!
Her phone buzzes and she picks it up.
Ed
How are you feeling today, babe?
Ed
I know you’re not fine, honey.
Ed
And it’s okay not to be fine, but what happened on Wednesday…
Sue
I’m sorry. I lost it.
Sue
It won’t happen again.
Ed
I don’t mind if it does. I’m just worried about you.
Ed
You’re getting more depressed every day.
Ed
What about seeing a psychiatrist?
Ed
One of my colleagues recommended a good one.
Sue
You spoke to people at work about this?
Ed
It’s nothing to be ashamed of.
Ed
And they’re all doctors anyway.
Sue
Nothing to be ashamed off????
Sue
I can’t give you children.
Sue
Do you know how that feels?
Sue
I’m broken. I’m not a real woman.
Ed
There’s nothing broken about you.
Sue
I have a hostile womb. How is that not broken?
Sue
I don’t want to adopt. I can’t.
Sue
I’ve always wanted to see some of myself in my own child.
Ed
We’ll do more IVF then.
Sue
We’ve already done nine rounds.
Sue
And you heard what the doctor said on Tuesday.
Sue
You’re a doctor, Ed. A man of science…
Sue
You know there’s no such thing as a miracle.
Sue
And we’d need a miracle at this point.
Ed
I don’t care if we can’t have children.
Sue
This is all I’ve ever wanted.
Sue
I don’t know if I can live without having a child.
Sue
All I want to do is look into the face of my child and see myself reflected back at me.
Sue
Is that too much to ask?
Sue
What have I done to deserve this?
Ed
You’ve done nothing wrong.
Sue
Maybe my entire family is just cursed, then.
Sue
My life has been such a disaster.
Sue
My parents dying like they did…
Ed
What has your sister got to do with this?
Ed
No one even knows where she is.
Sue
I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.
Sue
I’m confused. I don’t know. Don’t listen to me.
Ed
How many anxiety pills have you taken today?
Sue
I’m NOT abusing them.
Ed
People get addicted to those things all the time.
Ed
I’ve seen it many times before.
Ed
Look baby, I have to go. I’m sorry, but I have surgery now.
Ed
Can I call someone to come over and be with you?
Sue
I don’t need a babysitter, Ed.
Ed
I’m going to bring those adoption papers home tonight.
Sue
I DON’T WANT TO ADOPT.
Sue
You don’t understand.
Sue
I grew up without parents. A crazy twin sister who’s God knows where.
Sue
I NEED to see myself in my child.
Ed
I get it. I really do.
Ed
I just don’t know how to solve it.
Sue sits on the cold, hard bathroom floor again.
She’s lined the pregnancy sticks up like dominoes.
They snake their way around the bathroom floor.
She taps one and it falls…
The next one falls, and the next, and the next one.
A tiny smile tugs at her mouth as she watches them all fall down.
It’s a game she plays with herself when Ed’s at work.
She collects the sticks and is just about to lay them out again when the doorbell rings…
An hour later, Sue texts Ed.
Sue
You won’t believe who’s here!
Sue
I haven’t seen her in seven years. SEVEN!
Sue
It’s hard to say. I can’t get a coherent sentence out of her.
Sue
She’s completely manic.
Ed
Are you okay? Is she dangerous?
Sue
Honestly, you never know with her.
Sue
Exactly! She’s the last person on earth who should become a mother.
Sue
She says she doesn’t know.
Sue
And guess what else? She doesn’t want to keep the baby!!!!
Sue
Ed, I know this is a bit crazy, but what would you say if we offered to adopt her baby?
Ed
Wait. What? Slow down.
Sue
She’s my identical twin sister. Do you get it?
Sue
I’d have what I’ve always wanted. Something of myself in my child.
Sue
Don’t you see? This is the miracle that was never going to happen for us.
Ed
I thought you didn’t believe in miracles.
Sue
But she wants to have an abortion. We need to talk her out of it.
Sue
This is what I want, Ed.
Sue
I don’t think I can live another day knowing I’ll never have a baby…
Sue frantically pushes Greta into the bathroom and locks the door behind her.
It’s the only room in the house Greta can’t escape from, because the window is too small.
Outside the bathroom door, Sue is out of breath.
She slumps down against the door and inspects her arm.
Lines of broken flesh stare back at her.
Blood is pooling on her pale white skin from Greta’s nails.
She wraps a bandage around her arm to stop the bleeding and pulls out her phone.
She texts Ed, who is at work.
Sue
She needs another tranquilizer.
Ed
We can’t keep doing this. It’s going to hurt the baby.
Sue
She’s out of control again.
Ed
I wonder what went wrong. She’s been fine for months.
Sue
That’s how she is. One minute she’s fine, the next she’s not.
Ed
Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this.
Ed
Let her have an abortion. She’s so unwell!
Sue
I can’t believe you just said that!!!!
Ed
If she carries on like this, the baby will die anyway.
Sue
Ed, I am doing this. With or without you.
Sue
And I bought baby clothes yesterday. They’re so small and cute.
Ed
But look what keeps happening! We can’t all live like this.
Sue
You can’t take this away from me.
Sue
Please don’t take this away from us.
Ed
You’re right. I’ll be home soon.
Ed
Try and keep her calm in the meantime.
Sue
She says she’ll cut the baby out.
Sue
She’s holding the knife up to her stomach.
Sue
She’s going to kill our baby, Ed.
Ed
I’m coming. Try keep her calm.
Ed
See if you can give her a pill???
Sue
Okay. Okay. Hurry. Please.
Sue
There’s blood everywhere.
Sue
She cut herself. I tried to take the knife away but I’m bleeding.
Ed
Oh, my God. Are you okay?
Sue
Ed, I’ve done something.
Sue
Something bad. Something I can’t take back.
Sue
You have to see for yourself.
Sue
Oh God, Ed. I’m in so much trouble.
