Auric
Maria Locanda? This is Auric Alexander.
Maria
Wait, THE Auric Alexander?
Maria
The best tennis player at our school?
Maria
The one who’s probably going pro next year?
Auric
Why don’t we forget all that stuff about tennis and instead…
Auric
Focus on the fact that I sit behind you in our Communications class?
Maria
Umm, okay. I didn’t realize you knew my name though.
Auric
I also know that when you’re concentrating, you chew on the end of your pen.
Auric
And that your brow crinkles in this really adorable way.
Maria
Omg, stop—that’s so embarrassing.
Auric
Haha, don’t be embarrassed.
Auric
Look, I hope it’s okay I got your number from Stacy.
Auric
No, but she’s in class with us.
Auric
And I guess it wasn’t as hard to go up to her to ask for your number.
Auric
It’s just…I always get so nervous when I’m around you.
Auric
So I thought it would be easier to text you first.
Maria
Wow—this is all so surreal.
Maria
But I’m glad you texted me, Auric.
Auric
Can I take you to dinner sometime?
Auric
Is tonight too soon?
Maria
Actually—no. I’m free.
Auric
Good. I’ll pick you up at 7?
Auric
Which dorm do you live in?
Maria
But it’s really far from the Athlete’s dorm
Maria
So I can meet you halfway—on the quad.
Auric
Don’t be silly. I’ll come to you.
Auric
Just to be clear, I want this to be a date.
Auric
And that’s why I want to make it special.
Maria
I bet I can scrounge something up 😉
Maria texts her friend Destiny.
Maria
OMG, Tini. I need a dress.
Destiny
Haha, what have you done with my best friend?
Destiny
She lives in her yoga pants.
Maria
I’d get mad at you for saying that if it wasn’t true.
Maria
And if I didn’t have a crisis on my hands.
Maria
Seriously—I need a dress. STAT.
Maria
You’re never going to believe it.
Maria
Auric ALEXANDER texted me.
Maria
He asked me out to dinner tonight.
Destiny
THE Auric Alexander?
Maria
Yeah. Tini, he’s adorable.
Maria
Like, surprisingly shy.
Destiny
Wait, are you sure you’re talking about Auric Alexander?
Destiny
The one who’s going pro next year?
Destiny
The one who looks like Chris Pine?
Maria
OMG, I need to cancel.
Maria
He’s so out of my league.
Maria
I don’t go on dates that require dresses.
Maria
I don’t even own a nice dress!
Destiny
You know I have SO many dresses that are about your size.
Destiny
I’ll lend you one of mine.
Maria
Okay, be there in a minute.
Maria races out of her dorm room and down the hall.
She pounds on Destiny’s door, and after Destiny opens it,
Her voice is squeaky and high, and she can’t stop talking.
Maria
I’m totally freaking out.
Maria
Wasn’t he dating Kristin Kelly, like, last week?
Maria
I don’t look anything like Kristin Kelly.
Maria
That girl is so blonde her hair is basically white.
Maria
Not to mention, she’s a twig—
Maria
And there’s nothing twiggy about this butt.
Destiny
Haha, well…maybe Auric Alexander wants to tap that.
Destiny
It’s time for all of us big booty girls to get a chance!
Maria
OMG, STOP—I didn’t even think of that.
Maria
Do you think Auric is going to expect something?
Maria
Especially after this fancy date?
Destiny
Don’t be such a loser—he’s a hot athlete.
Destiny
He’s probably used to girls throwing themselves at him.
Maria
Shit! I didn’t even think of that.
Maria
I was wrapped up in the fact that I was going on a date with Auric Alexander.
Maria
I think I need to cancel.
Destiny
Maria, you said that already.
Destiny
Just go, and if you’re getting a weird vibe…
Destiny
Shut it down and never see him again.
Destiny
Let’s just focus on the dress.
Destiny
I have a red one that will drive him crazy.
An hour later, Maria is squeezed into a form-fitting dress
That shows off every curve she possesses.
Her hair is swept back in a tight knot,
And her eyes are done up smoky and sultry.
Maria
I don’t even recognize myself.
Destiny
You look AMAZING.
Destiny
Girl, I’ve been dying to do your makeup for years.
Destiny
I’m glad Auric Alexander gave me a chance to finally try.
Maria
OMG, he texted six minutes ago!
Maria
It says: I’m downstairs. Should I come up?
Maria
Shoot, Tini! What do I say?
Maria
Ah, bye! Thank you!
Destiny
Haha, no problem.
Destiny
You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.
Destiny
But I heard he and Kristin Kelly used to screw on the roof of Klein.
Maria’s heart is pounding in her chest
As she takes the elevator down to the lobby.
When the metal doors open, the sight before her
Makes her jaw drop to the floor.
