Hazel
Thanks for stopping to pick me up earlier.
Hazel
Michael was a real…ugh
Jack
I couldn’t believe he left you out there.
Hazel
He offered me a ride home from school.
Hazel
I didn’t want to take the bus, so I accepted.
Jack
And he just left you?
Hazel
Yeah. He wanted to take me to HIS house.
Hazel
I think he wanted to kiss me.
Hazel
When I wouldn’t go, he told me to get out of the car.
Jack
Good thing I was coming by.
Hazel
I thought I recognized you.
Jack
I sit behind you in English.
Hazel
I know. You helped me with my bookbag the other day.
Hazel
When it slipped out of my hands.
Hazel
It was the first day of school. I was so nervous!
Hazel
You didn’t talk to me after that.
Hazel
I’m still nervous in school.
Hazel
No one talks to me. I think because I’m new.
Jack
Oh…yeah 😊 That’s why I was nervous…
Jack
The new school year.
Hazel
I mean, I’m new to the area, too. Everyone already has their groups of friends.
Hazel
And the guys pick on me.
Hazel
The other day, one of the guys picked me up over his shoulder and was spinning me around.
Hazel
It was embarrassing!
Jack
I think that’s Neanderthal speak for he likes you…
Jack
I bet it is your eyes. They’re very pretty.
Hazel
I’d never go out with a guy after that.
Hazel
I was wearing a skirt and am pretty sure the whole school saw my underwear 🙈
Hazel
He still teases me about it…
Jack
Ugh, some guys are so stupid.
Jack
This is a crazy school.
Jack
You have to be careful around people.
Hazel
Does it happen to you, too?
Jack
Ha! Girls don’t really pay attention to me.
Jack
Most girls want to date the football stars.
Hazel
You don’t play football?
Jack
They barely allow me on campus.
Jack
They’re always telling me to cut my hair, or change the color.
Hazel
I like the two different colors in your hair.
Jack
Me, too — the standard is total shit.
Jack
I like being who I am.
Jack
Why are you laughing?
Hazel
It was like on the ride home —
Hazel
For some reason when you curse, it makes me giggle.
Hazel
I don’t even know why it makes me laugh…
Jack
You think it’s funny?
Jack
Crap. Shit. Goddamn.
Jack
But back to your initial problem.
Jack
About the guys picking on you.
Jack
You should know, guys here have a code.
Jack
All you have to do is tell them you have a boyfriend.
Jack
And then they’ll leave you alone.
Hazel
So if a guy is picking on me, all I have to say is I have a boyfriend?
Jack
Yup. Then they’ll stop teasing you.
Jack
I see it all the time.
Hazel
But wait, what if they ask who my boyfriend is?
Hazel
Can I ask you a favor?
Hazel
If you don’t already have a girlfriend, can I just say you’re my boyfriend?
Hazel
I’m sorry. I just don’t know anyone else.
Hazel
But if you have a girlfriend, I understand. I won’t say that.
Jack
Sure. You can say I’m your boyfriend.
Hazel
Really? Thank you 🙂
Hazel
But if you meet someone in the meantime you want to date, let me know.
Hazel
And I’ll only tell people if they ask.
Jack
Maybe, we should…you know…
Jack
To be more realistic…
Hazel
Maybe hold hands in school?
Jack
Well I was going to suggest something else…but if you really want to?
Hazel
LOL, should I ask you formally, too?
Hazel
Jack, will you be my fake boyfriend?
Hazel
Will you save me from more utter embarrassment at school?
Jack
A girl has never asked me out before…real or fake.
Jack
Of course I’ll go out with you.
Hazel
You’re doing me such a huge favor!
Jack
You don’t owe me anything.
Jack
I’ll hold your hand any time.
Jack
I’ll even curse and make you laugh.
Jack
Maybe we should go on a date, too. Get to know each other.
Jack
So it is more realistic.
Hazel
That’s a good idea.
Jack
I don’t have a lot of money to go out…
Hazel
We don’t have to go anywhere in particular.
Hazel
Do you know the church next to where I live?
Hazel
There’s a little playground.
Hazel
It’s close enough for me to walk to.
Hazel
Do you want to meet me there?
Jack and Hazel meet at the park.
From the moment they see each other, they start talking about everything.
Neither one of them has felt so comfortable with another person before.
Before they know it, over two hours have passed.
Hazel rushes home, and an hour later, she texts Jack…
Hazel
OMG, I got back late! I was almost in trouble.
Jack
We were talking for so long, I didn’t even notice the time.
Hazel
Don’t worry. I explained it.
Hazel
Then I told my parents I was going straight to bed.
Hazel
If I stop texting you, it’s because they caught me and I had to put the phone down.
Jack
We should do it again.
Hazel
Do you think we’ll be believable now tomorrow at school?
Hazel
Don’t change your mind on me!
Jack
I wasn’t going to do that.
Hazel
I don’t think I could go to school again…
Hazel
If the guys keep picking on me.
Jack
I wouldn’t abandon you like that.
Jack
Okay, look, can I take you to school tomorrow?
Jack
Do you drink coffee? We can get some on the way.
Hazel
You’re so nice to me!
Hazel
I can’t wait to see their faces when I say I’ve got a boyfriend.
Jack
I can’t wait to see your face.
Hazel
My parents are coming, GTG
Jack
Tomorrow morning…I’ll text you when I’m close to your house so you can sneak out.
Hazel
Okay. Night, my fake boyfriend.
Jack
Goodnight…my fake girlfriend.
